The only commandment with a promise is the one to honor your father and mother. Ephesians 6:2-3 (AMP) reads, “Honor (esteem, value as precious) your father and your mother (and be respectful to them) this is the first commandment with a promise– so that it may be well with you, and that you may have a long life on the earth.”
The times we live in people are saying, “Don’t judge me.” And people think they can do whatever they like because, they, after all, know God and He knows their heart and He is the only one who can judge them. There is some truth mixed in with all that but, Hebrews 10:31 makes me want to walk humbly before God because it says, “It’s a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of an angry God.” The context of that verse is talking about people who continue to sin, treating the blood of Jesus as common. I say, let God’s Word judge and convict me so He doesn’t have to come judgment day. So what does “Don’t judge me,” have to do with honoring our father and mother? This is an area that many are walking in judgment, not from other people, their own life testifies against them, yet they are totally unaware. For example, where, in your life, are things not going well? Are there patterns of the same problem over and over?
The precepts of the Bible, God’s Holy Word, work whether we are Christian or non-christian. If God had not had someone write those Holy pages we would be unaware of why we are reaping some of the things we reap. God did not have authors write those things to constrain us but rather to set us free. He desired that we have life and life abundantly,(John 10:10) so He sent His Word with how to live life abundantly (John 1:1). Even Christians, who believe the Bible, are often unaware of why life seems to always go sour in certain areas. So many people are just unaware of why things are as they are in their life. They keep going around the same mountains, seeing the same trees, drinking the same water with no real solution as to how to break free of the cycle. Things may even go well for awhile but eventually there the problem is again. There may be other principals that should be looked at as well but generally when things aren’t going well in your life, you keep going around the same mountain, it can usually be traced to some area where parents haven’t been honored.
God didn’t say, “Honor good parents.” I know so many people didn’t have good parents. But this commandment with a promise still is true. I know many people who did not have honorable parents but yet chose to honor them. The blessing upon their life is visible. When we choose to honor our parents, whether we perceive them as good or bad, we are putting our trust in God that He will cause things to go well with us, as His Word says. He is always faithful to His Word.
Think of the people you know who honor their parents and those who do not. What’s their lives look like? This doesn’t mean we obey everything they say as adults. It does mean we esteem their words as carrying weight and value because of their place in our lives. I once heard about a man that I know who was cheated out of some money by a roommate. The man really left this guy in a mess. As he was praying he told God he had asked him for wisdom before allowing this guy to room with him. He really didn’t understand why, since he had prayed, all this had happened. God told him that He had indeed sent wisdom— He sent it in the form of his Dad. This man had discounted his Dad’s advice and paid a bitter price. How many times have we wished we had paid closer attention to words from our parents? Like this man, we’ve all judged our parents to be out of touch and not understand. And we’ve all reaped that judgment. Even when we don’t agree or can’t see the wisdom in their words, if we will listen and ask God to show us the truth, He will lead us. The fact that we didn’t judge their words as foolish but took what we did not understand to God means that things will go well with us.
Counselors know most problematic behaviors can be traced back to the original family. What was your relationship with Mom and Dad like? Usually there’s a correlation to the problem at hand. What bothers you about your parents? What do they do that really gets on your nerves? What did you hate that they did or do? What do they do that you said you would never do? How is all of that working out for you? The things that they did that bothered you in some way— usually, you will have it, your spouse will have it or you will be unbalanced in the opposite direction. Just ponder on that a little while.
Take some time and reflect on problem areas in your life. Write them down. See if you can see how it relates to areas you may have judged in your parents lives. Ask God to show you. Many times it’s harder to see if you had “good” parents. Even “good” parents are human and we must look at how we have dishonored them, even unconsciously.
I actually cringe when I hear people discount the words of their parents,even making light of them. I know the reaping on that will not be good but usually they won’t even realize what set it all in motion.
Once you realize any places of dishonor, forgive them and repent for resenting them. Pray blessings over your parents, if they are still with you. “Honor your father and mother, so that you may live a long, full life in the land the LORD your God is giving you.” Exodus 20:12
Coffee With the King 